AkuRoku: Raise
by Habbiki
Summary: It all starts with a broken promise, death, and then a new life. Rated M for rape. You have been warned.
1. Broken Promises

**AkuRoku Broken Promise **

"That's not the fucking point!" Roxas screamed at Axel.

"Then what the fuck is? I'm tired of fighting with you!" Axel shouted.

Roxas scowled at him and stormed to the door. "Goodbye Axel," Roxas spat opening the door.

"Hold on Roxas," Axel said walking forward.

Roxas turned to glare at him. "What? Don't ask me to stay because I won't," Roxas said coldly.

"No, I'm leaving this time. You're the one always fucking leaving, it's my turn," Axel spat before storming out into the rain.

"Fine then! Leave! I don't give a fuck!" Roxas shouted before slamming the door and throwing himself on the couch.

Axel stalked through the rain to his motorcycle fuming. He climbed on his motorcycle. Axel picked up his helmet, examining it. Roxas gave it to him for his birthday because he never wore one.

'Promise me you'll always wear it,' Roxas had said after Axel thanked him.

'I promise,' Axel said smiling.

Roxas also promised to never cheat on Axel either. Axel doesn't give a fuck how drunk Roxas was, that doesn't mean he can kiss Sora.

Axel ran his fingers over the words etched in the back. 'Got it memorized?'

Axel threw the helmet at the garage. If Roxas can break promises then so can he.

Axel started the bike and sped off.

Axel bent forward as the rain soaked through his clothes. His wet hair whipped around his face as he sped down the winding rode.

'Stupid Roxas, he cheated on me and expects me to forgive him so easily. I don't have to forgive him if I don't want to. He was mad at me for weeks because I broke his stupid necklace,' Axel thought furiously.

Axel closed his eyes as an image of Roxas kissing Sora filled his vision. Axel shook his head trying to get rid of the image but it just kept coming back.

Axel opened his eyes so he can see where he's going.

"Oh shit," Axel hissed narrowly avoiding a big rig.

Axel's motorcycle spun as he swerved to avoid the truck. I black sedan swerved around him causing him to turn the other way. The sedan hit a truck, flipping over. Axel swerved out of the way as the truck skidded his way.

Axel stopped once he was in the clear. His eyes widened as he noticed bright lights on him. He looked up as a silver car flipped over the sedan. Axel tried to move as the car seemed to fall in slow motion over him but his muscles stayed locked in place.

Roxas wiped his tears away. He looked down at his phone as it vibrated.

"Hello," Roxas said.

"Roxas its Axel," Namine said.

"I don't want to talk to him right now," Roxas grumbled.

"Roxas, Axel's in the hospital. He might not have that much time left," Namine whispered.

"What happened?" Roxas asked in a shaky voice.

"He got crushed by a car, he has internal bleeding. Come to the hospital. This is could be your last time to see him," Namine whispered sadly.

"I'm on my way," Roxas said before hanging up.

Roxas ran down to his car and sped to the hospital, crying.

Roxas ran into the hospital dripping wet. When he spotted Namine he ran over to her.

"Where is he?" Roxas asked clinging onto her, tears streaming from his eyes.

Namine looked at a door that Reno just left from. Namine wiped her tears away as she watched her brother hurry off to Axel's room.

Roxas passed a crying Reno on his way to Axel.

"Axel?" he asked walking up to the bed.

Axel turned his head weakly looking at the blond. He smiled slightly. Roxas took his hand in both of his, tears running down his face.

Roxas' heart broke at the sight of his love all bruised and bandaged up in a hospital bed. Axel looks so weak and fragile.

"Axel, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for everything. For cheating on you and for this," Roxas said gesturing to Axel's condition. "It's all my fault. I had no reason to get mad at you."

"Shush. Its okay, Roxy. It's not like you meant to kiss Sora, you were completely wasted," Axel said smiling. "This isn't your fault. I shouldn't have left," Axel said seriously.

Roxas let his head drop a little. "Don't blame yourself. I love you, and that's all that matters," Roxas whispered.

Axel touched Roxas' cheek. "I love you, too. You are my heart," Axel whispered.

Roxas shuddered as a sob broke past his lips. "You're my heart," Roxas whispered.

Roxas leaned forward and gently kissed Axel.

"Please don't go," Roxas whispered as he heard the beeping slow.

"I'm sorry I broke my promise," Axel whispered.

"What promise?" Roxas asked lifting his tear streaked face.

"I promised to always wear my helmet and I didn't—not this time," Axel whispered weakly.

"I forgive you, like always," Roxas whispered kissing Axel again.

"You're not yelling at me," Axel whispered.

His heart beats are farther apart.

"If you stay, I'll promise to kick your ass later," Roxas whispered stroking Axel's hair.

Heart beats are getting slower.

"I can't break another promise," Axel whispered.

Barely there.

"Please don't leave me," Roxas begged sobbing now.

"I'm sorry, Roxy," Axel whispered, his voice barely audible.

"We'll see each in the next life. Right, love?" Roxas asked.

"I promise," Axel whispered.

Axel slowly closed his eyes as his ragged breath slowed.

Roxas leaned down and pressed his lips to Axel's one last time.

The loud beep echoed through the silent room with only one beating heart.

"Axel?" Roxas asked refusing to accept the undeniable truth.

"Axel?" Roxas asked shaking the lifeless body.

Roxas let his head fall down on the silent chest. "Axel," Roxas sobbed.

"Roxas?" Namine asked.

Roxas looked over his shoulder at his crying sister.

"I'm so sorry," she murmured.

"What's the point to anything?" Roxas asked.

"I-I don't know," Namine murmured looking down.

Roxas kissed Axel's cold cheek before leaving. Roxas ignored his car and walked home through the relentless rain.

He wrapped his arms around his self as he walked through the rain feeling nothing.

Roxas opened the door to his home—no, his house. It's not a home. Not anymore. Not without Axel.

Roxas sat down in the kitchen. He rolled up his sleeve and looked at his scarred wrist. He used to cut but Axel got him to stop.

Roxas' head snapped up as an idea came. Roxas walked to the liquor cabinet and grabbed out two bottles of vodka.

Roxas opened the bottles and walked to the bedroom where he had made love with Axel. The bedroom they used to share.

Roxas poured the alcohol around the room and grabbed Axel's favorite lighter. Roxas played with it before torching the room.

Roxas looked around the burning room and sat down on the floor. He grabbed a shoe box from under his dresser and pulled out his old cutting blade and towel.

Roxas closed his eyes and relaxed, letting the warmth from the fire sooth him. Eyes still closed, Roxas lifted the blade and dug it into his skin reopening the old wounds. He cut deeper, clenching his teeth from the pain but not letting out a sound.

Roxas let his arm drop, weak from the blood loss. Roxas slowly opened his eyes inhaling the smoke waiting for the darkness to take him. He let his head drop to look at his torn up arm.

Roxas smiled slightly at his work before grimacing in pain. The fire licked across the floor closer to him. He brought his legs up closer, away from the fire. He didn't want to burn, not yet.

It got harder to breath as smoke filled his lungs. Roxas coughed weakly waiting for the pain to go away.

The pain slowly ebbed away from his body. Roxas smiled grateful that he was finally going away. The room faded into darkness.

Roxas whispered, "I'm sorry…I broke my…promise…Axel," as he slowly faded away into oblivion.


	2. Chapter 1

**Raise Chapter 1**

PLEASE READ AUTHOR'S COMMENTS BEFORE READING TO AVOID ANYTHING UNPLEASENT.

I sat in the dark room. Everything is so quiet. My arms hurt. I gently touched my wrist feeling warm liquid gushing out. I shuddered as the sudden warmth blazed across my skin. I winced, shielding my eyes as fire burst around me.

I blinked as my eyes got adjusted to the bright light. I looked around the room, the fire trapped me. I looked down at my bleeding wrist. I coughed as the smoke filled my lunges.

My eyes widened as I noticed an opening between the flames. I crawled toward it as the fire crackled louder. I squinted my eyes trying to make out a figure.

A guy stood several feet away from me, watching me struggle. His red hair matched the crackling flames surrounding me. I can't see his face, only a pair of glowing green eyes.

"In the next life," he murmured lowly but I could still here his sweet voice over the loud crackling flames.

He turned around, away from me, and walked away.

I screamed a name. I think it's his name but I can't here myself because everything got really silent. No sounds.

I sat in the dead silence that surrounded me as I slowly faded away.

I screamed waking up. I shot up into Namine's waiting arms. I wrapped my arms around her, hiding my face in the crook of her neck. Namine gently rubbed my back.

"Another nightmare about mom and dad?" Namine asked backing away to wipe the tears from my face.

"Y-Yes," I lied.

I never have nightmares about mom and dad anymore. Only of Rufus.

My mom and dad died in a fire when I was 12. I was an orphan for two years before Namine was old enough to take me in. By then Namine had a boyfriend who she is now married to. After Namine and Rufus got married everything seemed to be perfect—as perfect as things can get after your parents burn to death—until Rufus came in that night.

Namine went to some art show in Traverse Town and stayed there over night. Rufus came in my room to say goodnight. I thought something was wrong when he kept caressing my cheek and kissing my forehead.

I asked him what he was doing and he kissed me. I pushed him away and he slapped me. You can guess what happened next. Every time Namine leaves it happens again. I'm scared to tell Namine because he makes her happy but he's gay and a rapist. But I've already caused Namine so much of her happiness, I can't do it again.

It's my fault our parents died. Namine says it's not but she only wants me to feel better. Like that can happen.

"Do you want me to set up an appointment with Dr. Vexen?" Namine asked brushing my hair away from my eyes.

"No," I said too quickly.

Vexen is my physiatrist. He's really creepy. I hate being in a room with him. He's so cold and heartless. He doesn't care about me he just wants to figure me out. Complete the puzzle.

"Roxas, you need help," Namine said shaking her head.

"I'm seventeen, I shouldn't have to go. Vexen's really creepy. I hate talking to him," I pouted.

Namine frowned, stroking my hair. "Fine, then, if you don't want to go I won't make you," she murmured.

"What's going on?"

I tensed slightly, my muscles coiling up. I shivered, feeling a freezing cold roll down my spine. I locked my jaw in frustration.

"Roxas just had another nightmare," Namine murmured getting up. Probably to go kiss the child molester.

"Can you guys leave? I have to get ready for school," I said coldly.

Namine looked at me with wide eyes, clearly offended by my tone. Rufus fixed his tie before glaring at me coldly.

"You need to have more respect for us. If it wasn't for us you'd be locked up in an orphanage or with some family that only adopted you for munny purposes," Rufus said coldly, still giving me his death glare.

"Rufus, honey, don't be so harsh on him. He's had a tough life," Namine said looking him in his cold eyes.

Rufus just glared at me and left my room. He won't glare at me like that tonight when she leaves. He never does.

Namine looked at me, stuck between leaving me alone or hugging me.

"Just go," I said not looking at her.

Namine left without a word as she always does.

I got up and grabbed my shoe box from under my dresser. I opened it and grabbed my blade and towel.

I sat down on my bed. I clenched my teeth as I dug the blade in my wrist.

"Come on Rox," Sora said pulling me away from my untouched breakfast.

"Roxas, you haven't touched your food," Namine protested as Sora pulled me out the house.

"I'm going to be late," I called before shutting the front door.

"Roxas, you should really start eating more often," Sora said in a disapproving voice.

"If I'm not hungry I don't see why I should eat," I said pulling my sore wrist from Sora's grasp.

Sora rolled his eyes. "As your friend I should tell you this is unhealthy."

"I don't care," I said climbing in Sora's car.

"Well, you should," Sora murmured starting his car and driving off to our stupid prison.

I hate school even though I'm good at it. I hate Sora but I love him at the same time. He's too happy all the time, it makes no since to be so happy but I love him to death. I can trust him with anything but I can't tell him about Rufus. He'll want to do something about it and I can't hurt Namine, even if that means hurting me.

Sora pulled into the school's student parking lot. He looked at his reflection in the car mirror. I hate looking at my stupid face. I look too innocent and sweet, I hate it. I made a noise of disgust before leaving Sora's stupid car.

I walked to my first class ignoring everyone around me as usual.

"I'll see you at lunch!" Sora called after me.

I raised my hand in acknowledgement.

"Roxy, you won't believe it!" Sora squealed jumping on me.

"What?" I asked irritably.

I propped myself up on my elbows, Sora sitting on my stomach.

"Riku invited me to his party!" Sora squealed.

I looked at him blankly. "Who's Riku?" I asked in confusion.

Sora's smile slowly faded to a look of disbelief. "You don't know who Riku is?"

"We already established that," I murmured rolling my eyes.

"I don't think I want to take you anymore," Sora said frowning slightly.

"Who is Riku?" I demanded.

"He's like the most popular guy at school," Sora said as if it's the most obvious thing in the world.

"You say that like he means something to the world," I said pushing Sora off me.

"Next you're going to tell me you don't know who Axel is," Sora murmured, stretching out on the grass.

That name brought something up. My heart beat a little faster and I smiled a little. A bright red filled my vision. I blinked, focusing on the real world.

"Sounds familiar, but I don't know who he is," I murmured.

"Where have you been? Axel is the most popular guy at school!"

"I thought Riku was."

"No, he's just Axel's best friend!"

"Stop shouting," I growled.

Sora finally shut up, leaving me to my thoughts.

Namine is leaving for a week. That means a lot of unasked for sex. Maybe I can spend the night at Sora's or something. Great. He hasn't gotten to rape me in about a month or two. That means this is going to be way longer than usual. Fuck. I fucking hate him. Tonight I'm going to have his stupid dick in my ass. I'm not even gay! Thanks to him I'm mentally unstable.

The bell rang. I got up to go to my class.

"You don't have to go through this Roxas. You can sleep over at my place," Sora murmured patting me on my shoulder.

I looked at him with wide eyes. "What are you talking about?" I asked my throat dry.

"I know you love Namine but this isn't right. You should tell her," Sora murmured.

"How do you know?" I whispered.

Sora smiled half heartedly. "We're like brothers. You can't keep this type of stuff away from me," Sora murmured before leaving me.

I stared after his retreating figure. He didn't tell anyone like I expected.

'Please don't come in here. Please don't come in here,' I begged over and over in my head.

I lay in fetal position in my bed holding my knees to my chest. The moonlight spilled through my window on to my bed. I stared at the door with wide scared eyes, waiting for him to come. Maybe he won't this time.

I winced as the door creaked open. I started shaking, holding the covers tightly over me. Tears already started to cloud my vision.

I closed my eyes as I felt the extra body weight on my bed. I shuddered violently as he gently pulled the covers off of me. He gently nudged me, trying to get me to loosen up. When I didn't he roughly pulled my legs away from my chest, pinning me down.

I looked up at him, tears about to spill over. I looked away as he began kissing my neck, trying to ignore what's happening. He roughly removed my clothes. I struggled to get away. He slapped me hard across the face.

"Please don't do this," I whispered as he removed my underwear.

He ignored me, turning me around lay on my stomach. I closed my eyes, trying to relax. That didn't work as he lubed me up. I shuddered violently as his dick prodded my entrance.

I bit down on the covers as he pounded into me. I started sobbing as he continued relentlessly. He reached down and started jerking me off. He always does that now, trying to get me to come with him. It never works.

I choked out a sob as the tears stung my puffy eyes. I hid my face in the pillow as I sobbed uncontrollably.

Rufus grunted as he came. He pulled out of me, rolling me around to face him. He gently wiped the tears from my flushed face. He pulled me in for a rough kiss, my mouth turned down in a scowl as he tried to force a reaction out of me.

He finally pulled away. "I love you," he whispered.

"I hate you," I spat pulling away from him.

He chuckled softly, cupping my chin in his hands. I glared at him with hate. Rufus' smile got replaced with a fierce scowl. He brought his hand back before slapping me with the back of his hand powerfully.

I grunted in pain as I felt my cheek throb. I gently held my cheek in my hand, looking up at him.

"You will learn to love me," he hissed before leaving me.


	3. Chapter 2

**Raise Chapter 2**

I wiped the blood off my razor. I carefully put the blade and towel back in my shoe box under the dresser. I rolled the sleeve of my school uniform down over my wrist. I took a deep breath before leaving my room.

I walked down the quiet hall, looking around. My quiet foot steps seem so loud in the eerie silence. I started to relax as I walked down the stairs. Maybe Rufus already left for work.

I froze in the doorway to the kitchen. Rufus looked up from his newspaper to smile at me. He looked me up and down like a predator. I looked down at my shorts that hung loosely around my waist and gulped before looking up again.

"G-Good morning R-Rufus," I stuttered.

"Roxas," Rufus said nodding, looking back down at his newspaper.

I let out a silent sigh, relaxing. I walked over to the fridge and opened it. I shivered as the cold air brushed against my legs. I grabbed the orange juice and closed the fridge. I grabbed a glass from the cabinet and began pouring the juice. I froze as I felt Rufus standing behind me.

Rufus is standing way too close. He rested his chin on my shoulder and placed his hands on both sides of the counter, making escape impossible. I continued pouring my drink with shaky hands.

"No breakfast today?" Rufus asked skimming his nose against my cheek.

"I-I'm not hungry," I murmured before taking a sip of my orange juice.

I put the glass down as he grabbed my hips. He turned me around to face him. Rufus pushed my cup away before lifting me to sit on the counter. He roughly spread my legs open, pulling me close.

I closed my eyes, shaking. He nibbled on my ear softly, rubbing my thighs.

"I-I have to go to school. Sora will be here soon," I gasped.

Rufus ignored me, pulling me in for a rough kiss. My eyes went wide as he stuck his disgusting tongue in my vulnerable mouth. I pushed him away, jumping off the counter. I ran for the door but he wrapped his arm around my wrist, pulling me to him.

Rufus glared at me, still holding my cut up wrist. I cried in pain. Rufus smirked and let me go. I stumbled back into the table. Rufus looked me up and down.

I felt the back of his hand crash into my cheek. I flew back over the table, falling down on the tiled floor. I cupped my cheek in my hand, holding myself up with my other arm. I looked up with watery as I heard foot steps get closer. Rufus walked pass me like I wasn't there. I let my head drop a little as he went up stairs.

I stretched my jaw, wincing at the pain.

I didn't look up as the door opened.

"Oh my god," Sora gasped dropping his bag. He ran up to me, dropping down on his knees.

"Are you okay?" Sora asked, taking me in his arms.

"Yes," I said through clenched teeth. It hurts to open my mouth wide.

"Your cheek," Sora whispered.

I got up to look in the mirror. I groaned at my bright red swollen cheek.

"I have to go to school with this," I groaned ignoring the throbbing.

"Roxas, I can't let you stay here while Namine is away," Sora whispered.

"He won't let me go anywhere," I whispered looking at Sora's reflection in the mirror.

"Ask Namine. She'll think something is up if she says you can and he won't let you."

I looked over my shoulder at the determine brunette. It makes since…

"I'll call her."

I lay down on my stomach in the grass, counting the grass blades as I waited for Sora to come with my food. I didn't want to wait in the lunch line because people keep staring at me because of my stupid cheek.

"Roxy," Sora sang giving me a sandwich.

"Thanks Sora!" I said smiling. I rolled over to face him.

I looked at Sora with a sweet smile on my face. Sora smiled at me, looking like an angel because of the bright white light radiating behind him.

"He is cute," a silky voice said.

I turned to look at two guys standing next to Sora. One is around me and Sora's height, maybe a foot taller. He has silver hair and aqua blue eyes that blazed from behind his long silver bangs. His eyes kept flickering to Sora every ten seconds.

I looked over at the tall redhead. My eyes widened as I took him in. He has bright red hair, like fire truck red. His face is like really beautiful. A smirk seems permanently carved on his face. He has two purple-blackish tear drops under his bright green eyes. His eyes are this vivid green. They tugged a memory from deep in my heart…

He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me into his side. I snuggled into his toned chest, feeling safe in this dark room. He cupped my chin in his hands, gently lifting my face up. "I love you," he whispered in his silky voice. My eyes met his acid green ones. "I love you too," I whispered feeling my cheeks heat up

"I'm not cute," I huffed sitting up.

"Stop being rude Roxy," Sora scolded sitting down next to me. "This is Riku and Axel," Sora said gesturing to them as they sat down.

"Roxy's a cute nick name," Axel smirked, sitting down next to me.

I scowled at him. "You can't call me that."

"He's even cuter when he's mad," Axel cooed, pinching my nose.

I made a noise of protest that sounded like a yowl, trying to remove his hand. Axel chuckled, not letting go. I pulled back, falling on my back. Axel fell on top of me, not letting go of my nose. I rolled on top of him, trying to pull his hand away.

I looked him in the eye, glaring at him. Axel glared right back, not backing down. I scowled at him, pulling at his hand.

This should be uncomfortable or awkward. I am on top of a stranger, pressed really close against him and I feel…safe? Comfortable? I don't know, but it feels right.

I let go of his hands and put mine on his chest, pushing away. His hand slipped off my nose and I fell forward. Our heads bumped together and I fell over, lying next to him.

I looked over at him, scowling. Axel just smirked at me. I glared at him, and then a giggle bubbled from my throat. I covered my mouth, blushing. I never giggle.

"Did you just giggle, Roxy?" Axel asked smirking, one eyebrow raised.

I shook my head, hands still covering my mouth. Another giggle bubbled out. I closed my eyes and started giggling madly.

Axel turned his head to look at me as I controlled my breathing. I turned my head to the side to meet his eyes.

"You got Roxy to laugh! He never laughs anymore," Sora squealed.

I turned to glare at Sora. Sora looked at me with scared eyes and hid in Riku's side.

"So, how'd you get your nickname?" Axel asked, changing the subject.

"About a year ago his brother-in-law, Rufus, called him Roxy and I started calling him Roxy ever since," Sora said.

I glared at him again. Rufus first called me Roxy after he raped me for the first time. Not really something I want to think about right now. Sora looked at me with wide eyes, realizing what he just brought up.

"Your brother-in-law gave you that nickname?" Riku asked raising his eyebrows.

"He likes to play around with me," I said frowning a little.

"Anyways, Roxy you need to call Namine," Sora reminded me.

"I'll call her after school," I murmured dismissing the subject.

I shivered as the cool spring wind whipped around me. I rolled over into Axel's side, hiding from the cold. Axel froze for a moment before wrapping his arm around me.

I lay in the arms of a stranger, feeling the safest I have felt in years.

"Why the fuck not?" I hissed into my phone.

"Don't use that language with me Roxas. It's a school night. You can spend the night at Sora's for the whole weekend," Namine said sounding irritated.

I could just imagine her with one hand on her hip and the other rubbing her forehead. I wonder what she'd look like if I told her I'll try to have fun tonight while her stupid husband is fucking my brains out.

"That's not good enough," I murmured, my voice hollow.

"Roxas?" Namine asked sounding worried.

"What?" I hissed, getting angry again.

"You're always so angry when I'm gone. What's wrong? Tell me so I can help," Namine pleaded.

I closed my eyes, feeling so frustrated. "You've helped enough. I don't need your help," I spat.

"Roxas just tell me what's wrong," Namine pleaded.

"It doesn't matter. It never did," I hissed before slamming my phone shut.

I slammed my phone on the counter, letting my head hang.

"Roxas," Sora whispered putting a hand on my shoulder.

I shook my head as the angry tears rolled down my cheeks. I'm tired of crying. I cry all the time. I wiped my tears away before looking at Sora. Sora starred at me with pity. Great. He feels sorry for me.

"Leave," I commanded.

"I'm not going to leave you here with him"—Sora began.

"JUST LEAVE!" I yelled.

Sora took a step back. He closed his eyes, shaking his head as tears rolled down his cheeks. He opened his eyes to glare at me.

"I'm not leaving you with him!" Sora said fiercely.

I glared at him, shaking. I forced the tears back.

"It's okay to cry Roxas. I won't think any less of you if you do. You're still a strong person, the strongest I know," Sora said taking a step forward.

I clenched my jaw, the unshed tears stinging my eyes.

"It's okay," Sora said holding his arms open.

Everything happened so fast I don't even know how it happened. One moment I was glaring at Sora, fighting back tears. The next I'm in Sora's arms on the couch, crying my eyes out. Sora rubbed my back as I cried out all the tears I've been holding back.

The worst part is that Sora can't stay. Rufus won't let him. Not while Namine's gone. Not while it's his time to love me.

A sob ripped out of my throat as he pounded into me again. I bit down on my pillow, clenching the covers in my hands as he continued. I buried my face in the pillow, shaking.

He held on to my sides as he came, grunting loudly. He pulled out and collapsed beside me. I turned to glare at him like I always do. The same hate filled glare.

Rufus tenderly wiped away my tears and brushed my hair out of my face. He leaned in and kissed my forehead.

I closed my eyes, curling into a ball, wishing he'd go away.

I kept my eyes closed as he forced my face up. He gently kissed my warm lips; they turned cold under his gentle touch. The opposite of any fairy tale. His kiss killed me a little inside like always.


	4. Chapter 3

**Raise Chapter 3**

I sighed contently as I looked over the beach. I smiled as he wrapped his arms around my shoulders from behind. I gently held his hands in my own.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" he murmured close to my ear.

"I want to live here," I whispered.

He kissed my cheek. "Then I'll buy you a house right next to the beach," he murmured.

"You're always spoiling me," I murmured blushing.

"I just want you to have the best life possible. If that means I have to buy you everything then I will," he murmured.

"I'll have the best life ever as long as you are there," I whispered looking into his bright green eyes.

He smiled softly. "Stop it Roxy, you're making me blush," Axel teased before attaching his lips to mine.

My eyes shot open. I scanned my dark room. I sighed, rolling over. I gently touched my lips with my fingertips. My lips tingled from the kiss though it was only a dream. But the dream felt so real, like it already happened.

I closed my eyes, thinking. Where were we?

My eyes shot open. Destiny Islands…

I've never been to Destiny Islands. I never even heard of it but I'm positive that that's where we were.

I looked over at my clock. 6:30. I guess I can get ready.

I walked past the kitchen, hoping Rufus wouldn't see me.

"Roxy," he called.

I froze my hand on the door knob. It would be too easy to just up and run off. He won't see you for the rest of the weekend. The next time he will see you Namine will be here. So turn the door knob you big wimp.

I opened the door, prepared to run, but strong hands pulled me inside. Rufus roughly turned me around to face him.

I twisted my face up into the nastiest scowl I can muster. "Rufus," I spat like his name was venom burning my tongue.

"You aren't going to leave without saying goodbye?" Rufus hissed, angry about my tone.

"I was about to until you stopped me," I said looking him up and down with disgust.

"Roxy, baby, how many times do I have to tell you not to talk to me like this?" Rufus asked calmly, shaking as he held back his anger.

"I'm not your baby. Don't waist your breath because I won't listen to you," I said folding my arms across my chest, looking away.

Rufus grabbed my face and forced me to face him.

"That's what I love about you. You're so stubborn and stupid."

"I hate you so fucking much. Get off me you stupid child molesting fuck or I'll tell Namine," I threatened.

Rufus chuckled softly, his hand trailing down my throat slowly. His hand traveled down my side, wrapping around my waist. He pulled me really close to him, so that our bodies are pressed together.

"Don't think I've forgotten. I know you didn't," Rufus whispered in my ear.

I closed my eyes, trying to fight back the memory but it's like trying to hold back death for a few more minutes.

A sob ripped out of my throat, even though he's finished. I looked over at the man I now hate as he got dressed.

"I'm going to tell Namine," I choked out.

He turned around to smile nastily at me.

"Don't even try that, child. Don't you think you've caused her enough pain and unhappiness?" He asked coldly.

"W-What are you talking about?" I asked as I covered my violated 15 year old body.

"Well, Roxy, you did kill your parents then you took her life away. She never got to really live because she had to save up a lot of munny to adopt you even though you're a murderer."

"I-I didn't kill my parents," I choked out.

"Who started the fire?"

My eyes went wide and fresh tears rolled down my cheeks. I killed my parents…

"Namine always wonders how that fire started so she can deal with who ever killed her precious parents. I wonder what she'd do if she knew the murderer is living with her. You won't tell her," Rufus whispered.

"I can't…hurt her…anymore…ever again," I whispered.

Rufus smiled at me. "I'll see you tomorrow night," he murmured before leaving me to my depression

"I can't…hurt her…anymore…ever again," I whispered, barely audible.

Rufus smirked. "Exactly," he murmured before kissing my neck.

I closed my eyes, not caring what he does to me.

"Roxas, how did you let this happen?" Sora asked shaking his head as he examined the hickies scattered all over my neck.

"I don't know," I lied, closing my eyes.

"You're spending the night at my place tonight. Hopefully these will go away before Namine gets home," Sora murmured poking the 'love bites.'

"Namine won't be back until Wednesday," I whined.

"I have a plan," Sora murmured, I could here the smile in his voice.

"And what is that?" I asked, raising one eyebrow.

"You're going to stay over at someone else's house on Sunday and for the rest of the time Namine's gone. So, you can go back on Wednesday and he can't touch you," Sora said proudly.

"Whose house am I going to stay at?"

"Axel's," Sora murmured.

"Axel lives down the street from me," I pointed out.

"That's the point! He won't think you'd stay so close to home!"

"He'll tell Namine."

"Not if he doesn't want her to think he lost you."

I looked over at Sora's determined face and smiled. No ones ever tried this hard to protect me.

"You have a point," I said.

"So, you'll go through it?" Sora asked, leaning over.

"Sure," I murmured.

"Yay!" Sora squealed glomping me.

I tumbled to the ground, my head hitting the thankfully soft grass. Sora wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a bone crushing hug.

"Isn't that the cutest thing you've ever seen?"

"Too cute."

Sora got off of me. I looked up at Axel and Riku standing there. Blue eyes met green ones. I blushed, remembering my dream that felt so real.

"Hay, Axel, Roxy's going through with the plan. I just had an idea! How about we all sleep over at Riku's house after the party?" Sora asked looking around at us.

Axel and I looked at Riku. Riku looked into Sora's energetic blue eyes. "I guess you guys can sleep over," Riku murmured.

"Yay! Thanks Riku! You're the best!" Sora exclaimed before jumping on Riku unexpectedly.

Riku opened his arms to catch Sora instinctively but he fell over as Sora jumped on him. They tumbled down. Riku wrapped his arms around Sora's waist as they fell.

"Oof," Sora let out as his head hit Riku's chest.

Sora sat up, straddling Riku's waist. He peered down at the silver haired teen.

"Are you okay Riku?" Sora asked, pulling on one of Riku's eyelids.

"I'm fine," Riku murmured, brushing the hair out of Sora's eyes.

I looked away from their romance movie scene, disgusted. Love is just a sick game. Rufus taught me that much.

"What's wrong Roxy?" Axel asked.

"Nothing," I said, making my face impassive.

Axel lay back, folding his arms behind his head, one leg bent, and the other straight. He closed his eyes, relaxing. I hesitated a moment before lying next to him, my head on his arm. Axel peeked at me before closing his eyes again.

I closed my eyes, relaxing. A smile slowly spread across my face as I finally felt content. For the first time in a while I feel content.

I peeked at the redhead beauty next to me. He smiled contently, pulling me a little closer. I nuzzled into his chest, feeling peaceful and content for once.

"Are you sure you don't want me to go in with you?" Sora asked again.

"Everything will be okay Sora," Aerith murmured. "Roxas is a big boy; he can handle his mean brother-in-law by his self."

"Listen to your mom Sora," I said smiling as I opened the car door.

I stepped out and walked up to the stupid house. I took out my key and unlocked the door. I headed for the kitchen. Rufus should be eating dinner around this time.

I stopped at the sight in front of me. There is a nice dinner with candles on the table. Did he really? He actually made me dinner. I looked over the meal on the table. What a freak…

"Rufus?" I called.

Rufus stormed down the stairs. He grabbed me by my neck and shoved me into the wall. I winced as my head banged against it.

"Where were you? You're supposed to come home right after school. It's seven," Rufus hissed.

"Namine said I can spend the night at Sora's for the weekend," I choked out.

Rufus tightened his grip on my throat. "What makes you think I'll let you go?" he hissed.

"Namine will wonder why," I choked.

He loosened his grip a little so I can breathe.

"And Sora and his mom are waiting outside for me. Aerith will notice if I have any bruises or marks," I added quickly as he balled up his fist.

He let me go quickly, like I burned him.

"Fuck," he growled.

I looked over at the dinner. "Sorry to ruin your romantic dinner big boy," I said as I walked past him.

I jumped out of the way as he tried to smack me. I ran up stairs to my room. I grabbed a bag and quickly packed everything I'll need for my vacation from hell.

I ran down the stairs and right into Rufus' chest. I fell down, hitting my head on the stairs. I looked up, holding the back of my head. I tried to focus my eyes but everything kept spinning.

Rufus wrapped an arm around my waist and helped me up. I blinked slowly, trying to understand what I'm seeing. I closed my eyes tightly, trying to stop the spinning as Rufus led me somewhere.

I felt the soft couch under me. Rufus must have laid me down on the couch. I felt gentle fingers trace my lips. I opened my eyes a little. Bright red…

"Axel," I murmured, reaching out for the red.

"WHAT?"

Rufus' voice shook away my dizziness. I sat up quickly, backing away from the furious man.

"What did you just call me?" Rufus hissed.

"I-I" I stuttered not knowing what to say.

His eyes blazed. He carved his fingers into talons. He grabbed my shoulder, pushing me into a wall.

He leaned in so that his face was close to mine. Our noses touched.

"Who is Axel?" he demanded.

The color drained from my face. "N-No one, nobody," I whispered.

Rufus' face twisted up into the nastiest scowl. He crushed his disgusting lips to mine, digging his fingers in my hair roughly. He pulled away glaring at me.

"He better be nobody," he growled before walking away.

I stood there, frozen, not knowing what to do our how to move my muscles.

I heard the door open. "What are you still doing in here Roxy?" Sora asked picking up my bag.

Sora walked up to me, touching my lips.

"They're kiss bruised," he murmured, tracing my lips with his fingertips.

"Will Aerith notice?"

"Just don't look directly at her," Sora murmured as he turned away.

I looked in the mirror at my reflection. I gently touched my kiss bruised lips with my fingertips. I pulled down my collar to examine the bite marks on my neck. I looked at my whole reflection. My pail skin with the purple bruises scattered all over my neck.


	5. Chapter 4

**Raise Chapter 4**

Aerith put her hands on her hips, chewing on her bottom lip. Her green eyes scanned us suspiciously as she thought over her answer.

"Sora, you aren't the world's best driver, that's why I didn't get you a car when you got your license. Why should I let you drive my car?" Aerith asked.

"Mom," Sora whined. "I don't want to get dropped off at a party by my mother. Everyone will think we're babies!" Sora complained.

"It's for your safety," Aerith said.

Sora pouted, and then his face lit up. "Roxy's a great driver! He can drive us! Please?" Sora begged giving Aerith his puppy dog eyes.

Aerith looked away from Sora. It's nearly impossible to resist giving him what he wants when he pulls out his puppy dog eyes.

"Roxas doesn't even have a car," Aerith protested.

"That's because he can't afford one," Sora protested.

Aerith looked at me seriously. "Are you a good driver?"

"I only made one mistake on the test," I said not trying to sound cocky.

Aerith studied my face for a while. "I guess you can drive," she murmured giving in.

Sora beamed at her. "Thanks mommy!" he nearly shouted hugging her.

Aerith smiled down at her son, wrapping her arms lovingly around him. He nuzzled into her torso as she buried her face in his chocolate spikes. I looked down at my shoes feeling…jealous. I wish my mom was still here to hold me like that or that Namine would. I wish I had someone who loves me like the way Aerith loves Sora.

A tear drop hit my shoe. I touched my wet cheek, surprised. I quickly wiped my tears away. I looked back up at Sora hugging his mother so lovingly.

The image and scene changed before my eyes. My eyes widened as the living room changed into a meadow.

I looked down at the thick grass scattered with little flowers of pink and yellow. I looked up at the trees surrounding the clearing. The pollen danced around me in the warm spring air.

A loud giggle caught my attention. My eyes widened as I saw my six year old self run into the meadow giggling.

"You can't catch me!" I teased.

The smile slowly faded from my face as a beautiful blond woman in a sun dress ran after me.

My eyes filled with water as my mom wrapped her arms around the little me. She picked me up and nuzzled my rosey cheeks. She cradled me in her arms and spun around. I nuzzled into the crook of her neck as she slowed down. She gently ran her fingers through my hair.

"I love you mommy," I murmured.

"I love you too my sweet Roxas," mom murmured softly in a gentle voice filled with love.

I clutched my throat with one hand, falling to my knees. I held back a sob as it threatened to rip from my throat. The room changed back. My eyes burned as I held the tears back.

"Roxas?" Sora asked alarmed.

I looked up at Sora. His worried face filled my vision. Sora kneeled down in front of me. He put a hand on my shoulder.

"Roxas, are you okay?" Sora asked.

"Throat burn," I lied getting up. "I need water," I choked out.

Aerith hurried off to the kitchen and came back with water and a pill. I drank the water and took the pill with out asking what it is.

"I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back," I said hurrying away.

I slammed the door, leaning against it. I took a deep breath, closing my eyes. I opened my eyes slowly and walked to the sink. I pulled out my wallet and took my razor out of it. I rolled up my sleeve and slashed the razor across my skin. I cut on the water and washed the blood away. I hastily grabbed some tissue and pressed it against my cut. I put pressure on it to stop the bleeding.

I threw the tissue in the toilet and flushed it away. I washed my hands and blade before putting it away. I pulled my sleeve down before opening up the door.

"Sora," I said.

Sora stood in my way, glaring at me.

"What?" I asked. Sora never glares at me.

Sora shook his head a little. "That won't stop the pain," he murmured closing his eyes.

"What are you talking about?" I asked though I already know.

Sora clenched his jaw angrily, his eyes flashed open. He grabbed my left hand roughly, stretching out my arm. He pulled up my sleeve exposing the cuts all over my pale arm. Sora looked down at my wrist with unreadable eyes, his face impassive. A tear rolled down his cheek. He dropped my arm and looked up at me with sad eyes.

"Roxas, this can kill you," Sora whispered as the tears stained his cheeks.

I closed my eyes, not wanting to see his hurt face. "I don't care," I whispered.

Sora gasped sharply. I opened m eyes to look at him. He has his eyes closed as he cried quietly.

"I do. You may not care if you live or die but I do," Sora whispered. "You're almost eighteen. You'll be able to leave him. He won't hurt you anymore."

"He won't but the memories will," I whispered.

"Try to forget. Try to move on. If you try you can."

"It's not that easy. My memories are a part of who I am. They will stay together forever inside of me, in my heart," I said placing a hand over my heart.

I looked up at Sora. Sora wiped his tears away. "Just don't go away. I don't want you to fade away."

"I'll try," I whispered to make him happy.

Sora smiled at me as fresh tears gushed out of his eyes. He shuffled forward and hugged me. I wrapped my arms around him, resting my chin on his shoulder.

I shouldn't have said that. What if things become too much for my heart to handle? What if I end my life? What will happen to Sora if that happens?

I pulled up the drive way and parked Aerith's car in Riku's garage.

"Let's go!" Sora said hurrying out of the car.

I got out of the car and followed Sora in Riku's house.

I winced as the bright strobe lights flashed. I looked around the crowded house filled with dancing teens. I felt Sora's hand enclose around mine. He pulled me over to a table I think.

"Hi guys!" Sora shouted over the loud music.

I recognized Riku and Axel at the table.

"Sora, do you want to dance?" Riku asked loudly over the blazing music.

"I'd love to!" Sora shouted letting go of my hand.

He grabbed Riku's hand and led him to the dance floor. Sora looked over his shoulder to smile at me before disappearing in the crowd of dancing bodies.

I felt warm arms wrap around my waist. "Do you want to dance?" Axel whispered his lips against my ear.

"S-Sure," I stuttered.

Axel let go of my waist and grabbed my hand. I let him pull me to the dance floor.

We stopped close to Sora and Riku. I ignored everyone around us and moved to the beat. I moved my hips to the beat, getting closer to Axel. Axel placed his hands on my hips as we moved together.

"Can we get out of here?" I asked after we danced to a couple of songs.

"Okay," axel shouted grabbing my hand.

He led me out of the noisy house and into the backyard. We sat down on one of those swing-bench things.

"Did Sora force you to let me spend the night at your house?"

Axel leaned back, running his fingers through his hair. "I volunteered actually."

"Why'd you volunteer?" I asked surprised by his answer.

"I dunno. I just felt this…connection with you, like I already know you," Axel murmured.

"Why do you think I'm staying over at your place?"

"Sora told me you hate your brother-in-law and you don't want to be alone with him while your sister is away."

I smiled a little. Sora is so trustworthy. "How old are you?" I asked.

"I turned eighteen about a month ago."

"Who lives with you? I've seen you around your house before but no one else is ever there," I murmured.

"I live by myself," Axel whispered his eyes far away.

"Why?" I pried.

Axel smirked at me. "We can talk about that later," he said getting up.

He dug his hands in his pocket and walked away, back to the party. I stayed outside. It's too noisy in there for my taste.

I laid down on the swing and looked up at the sky. I watched the stars listening to the loud music blaring from the house.


	6. Chapter 5

**Raise Chapter 5**

"Okay…See ya later," Sora said before hanging up his phone.

"Axel's on his way?" I asked.

"Yup, he just left his house," Sora said rolling over on his stomach.

I rolled onto my side and probed my head up on my elbow. I traced patterns on Sora's arm.

"Do you think Rufus will find me?" I asked quietly.

Sora looked up at me, hearing the fear in my voice.

"I won't let him hurt you," Sora said fiercely.

I smiled slightly. Sora is so diligent sometimes. I love him like a brother. I hate how my pain hurts him. If only I could just go away so he wouldn't feel my pain but that'd make him hurt even more.

"So, do you like Riku?" I asked, changing the subject.

"What? No," Sora said blushing.

I smirked at him. "That blush on your face says something else."

Soras blush deepened as he hid his face in the sheets. Sora mumbled something I couldn't hear because of the covers blocking his face.

"I didn't hear that," I said, crawling up to him.

I ran my fingers along his ribcage, tickling him. Sora thrashed around, giggling madly.

"S-Stop!" he begged as I moved my fingers mercilessly along his ribcage. "O-Okay…I-I'll t-tell you!" Sora gasped.

I stopped. "Do you like him?"

"Yes," Sora murmured hiding his flushed face.

"I think he likes you to," I murmured.

Sora pulled the covers down enough to peek at me.

"You think so?" Sora asked sounding extremely insecure.

"He'd be crazy not to," I murmured softly, hiding my awkward feeling.

Sora smiled at me. I smiled back. Sora suddenly caressed my cheek.

"You have a beautiful smile," he murmured. "You should smile more often."

As he pulled his hand away, I grabbed it quickly holding his hand against my cheek.

"I need more to smile about," I murmured.

Sora leaned forward and kissed my nose. "When I get you out of there you will," Sora murmured.

Sora wrapped his arms around me and I snuggled into his chest for once. I snuggled into him looking for comfort.

I looked over as the door opened. Axel looked at us smirking.

"Can we make this a three some?" Axel smirked lifting his eyebrows suggestively.

"Shut up," I muttered blushing.

Sora let me go and I got up. I grabbed my bag and walked to the door. I looked over my shoulder at Sora.

"Thanks," I murmured.

Sora smiled at me as I left. I forced a smile on my face as I looked at Sora. The smile quickly slipped off of my face as I disappeared from Sora's view. I looked up, feeling Axel's gaze on me. He studied my face before taking my hand in his.

I smiled as his warm hand enclosed around mine. He led me down the stairs and out the house.

I gawked at the red sports car in the drive way.

"You like?" Axel asked unlocking the doors.

He opened the door for me as I nodded like a mindless zombie. I got in the car carefully, not wanting to ruin the leather seats. Axel got in and started the car.

As he drove off he asked, "What do you think of my beautiful car?"

"I think it's a pity animals had to die to make these stupid seats that stick to your bare skin when it's hot. I don't think an animal should have died for your stupid car seats," I said folding my arms.

Axel chuckled softly. "Are you an animal rights activist?"

"No, I just don't think animals should die for the luxury of humans."

"Are you a vegetarian?"

"No, I just don't believe in killing animals for stupid things like your car seats."

Axel turned to smile at me. His smile nearly stopped my heart.

"I didn't pick the car, my dad got it for me," Axel said pulling in at his house.

I grabbed my bag and got out of his car. He led me up the porch steps and into his house. I looked around his home. It's not very big but it's nice. How could he afford this?

"Axel, how can you afford this house?" I blurted, and then blushed as I realized how rude I'm being. "Sorry, you don't have to tell me," I said hastily.

"It's okay," Axel said sitting down on his couch.

He patted the spot next to him. I dropped my bag and sat next to him, cuddling into his side.

Axel ran his fingers through his long spikes. "When I was about eight my dad left my mom for another man. He told her he's gay and that he's divorcing her."

"Axel, this is a sad story but I don't see what this has to do with your house," I interrupted.

"I'm getting there," Axel said smirking at my impatience.

"Oh, sorry," I said hastily.

"He ended up moving out and going to live on Destiny Islands with his husband. I could visit him some times but he can't have custody because he's gay. That left my mom real bitter. I look so much like my dad she hates to look at my face. She always tried to cut my hair or die it. When I was sixteen I told her I'm gay and she started yelling at me. She said I'm just like my dad and kicked me out.

"I had no where to go. I stayed over at Riku's house for a while but I couldn't live there. Riku's parents don't know he's gay and they would freak out if they knew why I got kicked out. I had no other choice but to call my dad. I haven't seen him in about a year because he stopped talking to me. He just…disappeared. I didn't even have his number. I had to look him up in the phone book. Well, it turns out he moved to Japan where he owns a computer business or something. He makes a lot of munny. So, he bought me a house and everything. He comes to visit me around Christmas and summer."

"Do you like your dad?" I asked quietly.

"He's okay. We get along alright but I wish I knew him better," Axel murmured.

"Have you seen your mom?" I asked quietly.

Axel made a noise in his throat that can only be described as a scoff. "I went back to talk to her, to try and sort things out. She told me she hates me and that I'm not her son."

I looked up into Axel's green eyes. He looks like he doesn't care but it's just a mask. A façade. Beneath his uncaring mask he's hurting. I can see the hurt buried deep inside his eyes.

I stretched my neck a little to kiss his cheek.

"She doesn't know what she lost," I whispered.

"And you do?" Axel whispered.

"…I think I do."


	7. Chapter 6

**Raise Chapter 6**

I watched the flames crackle in the fire place as I curled up into his side. I wrapped the covers more securely around us. Axel buried his face in my hair. I blushed lightly.

I traced patterns on his bare chest. Axel caressed my cheek softly, causing me to look up at him. I blushed as I met his intense gaze. I looked away quickly. Axel tilted my face up, forcing me to meet his gaze.

"Roxas, you don't have to be afraid. I won't hurt you," Axel whispered, tracing my lips with his finger tips.

"I know, but it's hard," I whispered looking down.

"I won't leave you like everyone else," he whispered causing me to look into his eyes.

"I-I believe you," I whispered.

Axel smiled at me before pulling my lips up to meet his. I hesitated a moment before kissing him back. Our lips slowly moved together as I adjusted to this new feeling. After a moment Axel pushed me away.

I looked at him, puzzled. He sat up without looking at me. He walked away. He stopped in front of the fire place.

"Axel?"

He looked over his shoulder at me with dead, glassy eyes. His skin pale and gray, his lips black.

"You promised," he whispered in a cold voice.

Tears rolled down my cheeks. "A-Axel?" I choked out.

"In the next life," he whispered.

Axel turned to face me. He smiled, revealing his sharp dead teeth. The fire behind him came to life, slowly wrapping around him. I crawled forward.

"A-Axel," I whispered as I crawled to him.

He closed his eyes as the fire engulfed him. He dissolved in the fire. The fire took my love away…

My eyes flashed open. I scanned the dark room. I calmed down as my eyes found Axel's sleeping face.

I snuggled more into his side. He tightened his arms around me. I hesitantly traced his lips with my fingertips.

I retreated my fingers when his eyes fluttered open. He blinked a few times before smiling at me.

"Hey, Rox," he whispered.

I smiled at him before letting my head rest on his chest. The last couple of days at Axel's have been the best. I haven't had so much fun in so long. In the couple of days I've been here Axel and I have become best friends. I haven't cut myself in days.

"Are you ready to go back home?" Axel asked breaking me from my thoughts.

Axel looked at me with concern as my eyes saddened. "I never want to go back there," I whispered.

"Is he that bad?" Axel asked, caressing my cheek.

"You have no idea," I whispered as thoughts of Rufus beating and raping me flashed through my mind.

"Roxas, what does he do to you?" Axel whispered.

"He abuses me," I whispered. I'm not exactly lying; I'm just not saying everything. He does physically and sexually abuse me. I just don't want to get exact with it. Axel doesn't need to know how fucked up my life is.

Axel cupped my cheek in his big hand. I looked at him through my long eyelashes.

"You can leave," he whispered. "When's your birthday?"

"June 13th. I still have a whole month before I can go anywhere and it's not like I have anywhere to go," I whispered.

"You can always come here," Axel whispered.

A huge true smile spread across my face when he said that.

"Really?" I nearly shouted.

Axel just nodded, smiling. I threw my arms around his neck, snuggling into his chest. Axel chuckled as he wrapped his arms around me.

Though I didn't need to hug Axel anymore I didn't stop. It feels…right. Like I belong in his warm, protective arms.

"Do you want to cook something?" Axel asked after a moment.

I pursed my lips, thinking. "Let's bake a cake!"

"From scratch?"

"There's no better way! Come on!"

"Axel, we should mix the dry ingredients first," I said as he prepared to crack the eggs.

Axel pouted. "But I like to crack the eggs," he pouted.

"You can crack the eggs after mixing the dry ingredients," Roxas said rolling his eyes.

"Axel, I don't wanna," I whined.

"Just suck it!" Axel shouted moving it closer to my face.

I grimaced at him. "I will bite it," I warned.

Axel smirked at me. "Sounds a little kinky Roxy."

I blushed, rolling my eyes. I opened my mouth and closed it around his cake batter coated finger. I sucked on hard, making sure to get all the cake batter off. Axel slowly pulled his finger out of my warm mouth.

"Now can we eat the rest with spoons?" I asked.

"I find eating with out fingers to be funnier."

"It's messier," I protested.

"Messes are always fun," Axel smirked sticking his finger in my mouth again.

I grabbed his hand as I sucked on his finger, smiling.

I took a deep breathe, starring at my lap. I folded my hands in my lap, not wanting to leave the safety of his car. Axel put a huge hand over mine.

"Rox, are you okay?" he asked sounding worried.

I looked up at him. "Can you walk me to the door?" I asked a little desperately.

Axel smiled at me. He grabbed my backpack and got out the car. I waited for him to open my door. He hates it when he doesn't open it for me.

I stepped out the car and walked up the paved walkway through the grass. Axel walked by me silently. I stopped in front of the door and turned to face Axel.

"Thanks a lot," I whispered.

Axel cupped my cheek in his warm hand. "Anytime," he said.

I quickly wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him, burying my face in his chest. Axel wrapped his arms around me, burying his face in my hair. I looked up at him, my arms still around him. Axel brushed the hair out of my face.

"See you later Rox," he whispered.

"Adios amigo," I whispered.

I let go of him and took my bag before walking back in the house.

I looked around the quiet dark house. Everything is so still…so quiet. I dropped my bag and took a step forward.

"Namine? Rufus?" I called as I walked into the kitchen.

No one. I walked up the stairs, looking around the quiet house. I walked down the hall calling for them. No answer. I hesitated in front of their bedroom door. I lifted my shaking hand and turned the doorknob. I stepped in, looking around the dark room.

"Namine?" I called.

I stiffened as the door closed.

"Namine's flight got delayed. She won't be here until morning."

I closed my eyes, shaking my head. This can not be happening. Rufus took a step forward.

"You've been irritating Roxas. Having me wait for you. I've missed you terribly."

He forced my face up. I kept my eyes closed, bracing myself for the blow that I know is coming.

"Look at me."

I kept my eyes closed, shaking.

I heard Rufus sigh. I flinched as the back of his hand collided with my cheek. I seemed to fly through the air from the blow. I grunted as my body hit the sift mattress. I tried to back away as he crawled on top of me.

He grabbed my ankle and pulled me back. I gasped as his cold lips touched my warm ones. He removed my clothes gently this time.

"Undress me," he whispered.

I looked up at him in shock. "Do it now or I'll tell Namine about your little problem," Rufus whispered looking down at my wrist.

My hands shook as I grabbed his shirt and tugged it over his head. Rufus smiled at before attacking my neck with his disgusting lips. My shaking hands found his zipper. I pulled it down and unbuttoned his pants. I closed my eyes and pulled his pants down. He kicked them off quickly. My hands shook violently as I tugged on the waist band of his boxers and pulled them down.

Rufus wrapped an arm around me, lifting me up. "Wrap your legs around me," he ordered.

I closed my eyes, hating myself, as I wrapped my legs around his waist. 'This is so wrong. He fucks Namine in this bed,' I kept thinking as he put lube on my entrance.

I bit my hand as he pounded into me. He rubbed my soft skin tenderly as he pounded into me. I bit my hand as silent tears fell down my cheeks. I tasted blood fill my mouth but I couldn't stop biting my hand.

He finally came. He pulled out of me and rolled onto his back. I got up quickly and gathered my clothes.

I went into my room and got a change of clothes and my razor. I went into my bathroom and cut the shower on. Once the water was nice in hot a rushed in and washed the filth off of me.

I picked up my razor to heal the pain. I watched the crimson water run down the train but the pain didn't cease.


	8. Chapter 7

**Raise Chapter 7**

I smiled up at him, taking the hunting hat. I put it over my messy blond hair, still smiling widely.

"How do I look?" I asked.

Axel fixed the red hunting hat so that it sat straight on my head. He buttoned up my peacoat and fixed my scarf.

"Beautiful as always," he murmured before kissing my forehead.

Axel took my hand again as we started walking down the dirt path scattered with orange leaves. I blew my breath out, smiling as it turned into smoke in the cold autumn air. Axel tucked his scarf securely around his exposed neck.

My eyes widened as I spotted the swing set. I looked up at Axel with wide pleading eyes.

"Go ahead," Axel said smiling.

I beamed at him. I stood on the tips of my toes to kiss his cheek before running to the swing set. I ran down the hill, the leaves flew in the air as I tore through them. I sat down on the swing, grasping the metal chains with my gloved hands.

I looked over my shoulder at Axel walking down the small hill, his red peacoat billowing in the wind. I looked forward as I began to swing. I closed my eyes as the cold air caressed my cheeks, turning them light pink. I swung higher and higher.

"Roxas, be careful," Axel warned sounding like a worried parent.

I smiled and began to swing higher. I closed my eyes, leaning my head back. I love the feeling, it's like I'm…flying. I opened my eyes and jumped.

I soared the cold air, flying high in the sky. Wait…I should have landed by now. I looked down as I began to fly away. My scared eyes found Axel standing on the ground by the swing set.

He smiled and waved at me. "In the next life. Promise?" he called.

The park around him started to disappear into darkness. The dark quickly eating away at the ground, getting closer to Axel.

"Promise," I whispered.

Axel smiled like he heard me before the darkness engulfed him.

I gasped, looking around my bright room. I shielded my eyes as the light blinded me.

"Roxas."

"Namine?" I asked, peeking through my fingers.

Namine sat down on the edge of my bed. I moved my hand, letting my eyes adjust to the light.

"Roxas, I found you a new therapist," Namine said happily.

"I don't need therapy," I groaned.

"Roxas, you keep having nightmares. I hear you moan in anguish every night. I want to help and this is the only way I can think of."

"Who's my new therapist?" I asked unwillingly.

"Rufus!" Namine said excitedly.

…

What the fuck? Did she just…? No fucking way!

Did I forget to mention that Rufus is a therapist? Well he is and now Namine wants the man who's causing my problems to fix them. Great. Just fucking perfect!

"Roxas?" Namine asked sounding worried. I never blank out like this.

"Get the fuck out," I growled.

"What's wr"—

"GET THE FUCK OUT!" I screamed throwing a pillow at her.

Namine got up and ran out of my room.

I jumped out of my stupid room and started pacing around my stupid room.

About an hour alone with that rapist? He's going to rape me every time! Does she know what she just did?

I quivered with anger. I can't control it.

"FUCK!" I shouted, knocking my dresser over.

I picked up the draws from the dresser and threw them against the wall, breaking them. The wall cracked as I continued to chuck things at it.

"Roxas! What the fuck are you doing?" Namine demanded, standing in my doorway.

"Get the fuck away from me you stupid bitch! I hate you!" I bellowed, pushing past her.

"Roxas!" Namine called.

I ran down the stairs, trying to get as far away from this place as possible. I ran into the front yard, looking around as the tears stung my eyes.

Where to go?

"Roxas," Rufus murmured from the doorway.

I ran away. I ran across the street and onto my neighbor's yard. I hopped over the fence and into their backyard. I ran across to the other fence and hopped over it.

I dropped down onto the park ground. I looked around before running across the park. I stopped on the top of the small hill. I looked down, my eyes falling onto it. A small smile crept up my lips. I stuck my hands in my pockets and walked down the small hill.

I touched the metal pole. I closed my eyes, remembering my dream.

My feet hit the ground softly. I looked over my shoulder smiling at Axel.

"I told you to be careful," Axel said as he strode over to me.

"It's not like I'm hurt," I said, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my chin on his chest.

Axel tucked my hair under the hunting hat, smirking at me.

"Tomorrow we're out of here. Are you excited?"

"I can't wait to leave," I murmured. "I still can't believe you bought me a house."

"You deserve the best."

"I already have the best," I said smiling at Axel.

He gently cupped my cheek in his hand, bending down to kiss me softly. I smiled into the kiss. Axel's traced my bottom lip with his tongue, begging for entrance. I opened my mouth, granting him entrance.

My eyes flashed open. That wasn't part of my dream…but it feels like a memory…like it already happened…but in a different life.

I walked over to the swing and sat down. I wrapped my hands around the cold chains. I closed my eyes and began swinging. I started to swing higher and higher, hoping to fly away.

"Be careful," A sweet voice called.

I smiled, swinging higher. As I reached the highest I can I jumped off. I soared through the air, lightly landing on my feet. I turned around to smile at my redhead.

"Swings are dangerous. A girl's hair got caught once and her neck got snapped."

"My hair is too short to get caught," I pointed out as I strode over to him.

Axel ran his fingers through my short, spiky, blond hair. He gently ran his fingers down my neck with the other hand.

"That's good. Your neck is too pretty to be snapped."

"And the girls?"

"Much too long. She looked like a horse," Axel smirked. "What are you doing here…in your pajamas and a jacket? Shouldn't you be at school?"

"Shouldn't you?"

Axel smirked again. "I should but I don't want to."

"Why not?" I asked, tilting my head to the side like a curious child.

Axel ran his fingers through his long crimson spikes. He walked over to one of the swings and sat down. He looked over at me, inviting me with his eyes. I walked over and sat down on the swing next to him.

"I always have dreams about this swing set. I figured if I come here long enough I will probably meet whoever is swinging on the swing."

"Do you know what the person looks like?" I asked a little hopefully.

"No. I only look up when he's up high in the sky. He always goes up right in front of the sun so it's kinda blurry. But he looks like an angel," Axel said dreamily.

I looked over at him. He gazed up at the sun as if he could see the angle swinging. Axel looked down at me and smiled. I smiled back, wishing to be the swinging angel in his dreams.

Axel wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his side as we walked down the paved road.

We walked in silence, enjoying nature in the park. I watched the birds play around, chasing each other. The butterflies and bees fly through the pollinated air carelessly. I looked down at the beautiful blooming flowers in the grass. It's all so beautiful.

"ROXAS!" a now annoying voice screeched.

I rolled my eyes. I tried to keep walking but Axel had stopped and looked around at the sound of my name being screeched, pulling me to a halt.

I groaned and turned around to glare at my stupid bitch of a sister. "What do you want?" I growled.

Namine glared at me, her hands on her hips. "Why didn't you go to school today?" she demanded in her irritating voice.

"I didn't feel like it."

"And who is this?" Namine demanded turning to glare at Axel.

"My friend, not that that's any of your business," I spat harshly.

"You actually have another friend?" Namine asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Don't get slapped," I warned.

"Roxas, it's time for your therapy lesson," Namine said, ignoring my threat.

"You need therapy?" Axel asked looking down at me.

"No, I don't and I'm not going," I said, glaring at Namine.

"Roxas," Namine growled, grabbing my wrist and pulling me away from Axel.

Namine kept a firm grasp on my aching wrist, tugging me away.

"Bye Axel," I called resentfully.

"See ya Rox," Axel said sounding confused.

I stared up at the ceiling, counting the spots on one tile. I heard Rufus shift in his seat slightly.

"Roxas, can you tell me about your dream last night?" Rufus asked professionally.

I ignored him, still counting the spots. Rufus shifted in his seat again. It sounds like he's leaning forward.

"You're a smart kid," Rufus murmured, I could hear the smile in his voice. "You know why you're here, don't you?"

"Have you ever notice that if you put a space between the E and R in therapist you get The Rapist?" I asked.

"You can call it rape if you want but I see it as me showing my love and adoration for you in a physical manner."

"AKA rape."

I heard Rufus get up from his chair and walk over to me. He kneeled down by my head, his lips close to my ear. I ignored him.

"You're really cute when you're concentrated on ignoring me," Rufus murmured, his hand traveling down my thigh.

"Mr. The Rapist, can you please keep your hands to yourself?" I hissed.

Rufus dug his hand in my hair, pulling it tightly. I grimaced in pain as he forced me to face him. Tears welded in my eyes as he pulled my hair tighter.

"You will cooperate when I make love to you," he growled.

"You call this love?" I hissed.

He pulled tighter, causing me to cry out in pain. Rufus smirked.

"That's the closest thing to a moan I've ever caused from you."

"You sick fuck," I growled, my eyes stinging.

Rufus smiled nastily, as he straddled my waist.

I opened my eyes as his weight lifted off of me. I rolled onto my side, grabbing my underwear. I quickly got dressed, staying on my side to ignore the throbbing in my ass. I rested my head on the arm of the couch, staring at him as he got dress.

"Is this what love is?" I asked quietly.

I stared at him, waiting for an answer. He ignored me and continued to get dress.

"I don't want to fall in love, if this is what love is. I don't want anyone to ever love me if this is what love is. I never loved anyone and…I don't think I ever will, not after this."

Rufus pulled up his pants and turned his head to face me as he buttoned up his pants. He looked at me with sad, regretful eyes.


	9. Chapter 8

**Raise Chapter 8**

I ran down the endless hall. My foot steps echoed loudly through the white hallway. The bright lights blinded me as the tears streamed down my cheeks.

The door.

I ran faster, trying to reach the door. The white wall started to close in around me. I gasped, running faster. The door way began to shrink.

I pushed myself to go faster. I have to see him. I slipped through the narrow doorway. I stopped in the middle of the room, breathing heavily.

I scanned the rows of beds, looking for him. There he is.

I ran down the row of beds, stopping at the one with bright red hair.

"Axel," I murmured.

He stirred weakly. His eyes met mine. Everything disappeared around us so that we were alone. Just him and I. All that really matters.

I grasped one of his pale hands, clutching it in both of mine. I softly kissed his knuckles.

An eerie silence overcame the small room. His blood red lips moved, forming words that I can't hear. I felt my lips move but no sound is coming out.

Axel gave a silent chuckle. He closed his eyes, shaking his head, his lips forming silent words.

Tears fell silently down my cheeks as I spoke silently. Axel's lips formed two more silent words. His hand went limp in mine. His eyes slid closed as he slid into a deep, unbreakable sleep.

The sound of my heartbeat filled the room, pounding loudly in my ears. My head dropped on his silent, unmoving chest. I pounded on his chest, begging him to come back.

I shot up, taking a deep breath. I looked around the brightly lit room. My eyes found Rufus'.

Rufus glared at me. He looked down at his notebook and began to write furiously.

"Who is Axel?" he growled.

Oh, right. I'm in therapy. Today Rufus decided to do the rape than talk.

"My friend," I whispered, lying back down.

"You said something about the next life. What is that about?"

"You tell me. You're the therapist," I spat furiously.

"Do you love him?" Rufus demanded.

My head snapped to the side to look at him. "What do you care?"

"Do you love him?" Rufus demanded.

"I don't love anyone."

"You should work on that," Rufus murmured.

"That's kind of hard to do while getting raped every day," I said sarcastically.

"You should consider choosing me," Rufus murmured.

I made a noise of disgust in the back of my throat. "I can see that, because I love you so much. I can just imagine my life with a rapist," I said sarcastically.

"Roxas, no one will love you more than I do."

I glared at him furiously. "Yeah, raping me is love. Someone will really truly love me one day and that person won't be you."

"Do you seriously believe that?" Rufus asked coldly. "Roxas, you are the closest thing to unlovable that I have ever seen. I'm the only person that can deal with you and your little bitch fits. No one is going to want you around with your negativity. Do yourself a favor and pick me, the only person who could love such an unlovable creature."

I stared down at my legs, thinking. I jumped up quickly. I headed for the door.

"What do you think you're doing?" Rufus demanded.

"I'm dismissing myself so I can get the fuck away from you," I spat harshly.

"Roxas," Rufus called but I already bolted away.

I ran down an alley, hoping over the fence and into a small neighbor hood. I ran down the street and took a right, heading for my house.

I reached my house in about fifteen minutes. I burst through the door, slamming it behind me.

"Roxas?" Namine asked, walking out of the kitchen. "Why aren't you in therapy? I know your session"—

"SHUT UP!" I bellowed at her.

I ran up the stairs, into my room. I slammed the door behind me, sliding down it.

I closed my eyes, escaping into my mind.

Roxas, you are the closest thing to unlovable that I have ever seen. I'm the only person that can deal with you and your little bitch fits. No one is going to want you around with your negativity. Do yourself a favor and pick me, the only person who could love such an unlovable creature.

Does anyone love me?

Namine does. She has to. I'm her brother. But…if she loved me wouldn't she show it? She doesn't love me because I'm me. I'm unlovable.

Sora does. He cares about me a lot. He shows it too. But…he doesn't help. Not really. He just says he's there for me. But he never does anything.

Rufus. He loves me. But he's sick. He's a sick man who I could never love back. But he's the only one that could love me because I'm me.

I hate myself. I hate everything about me.

I opened my eyes slowly. I crawled across my room, to my dresser. I pulled my shoe box from under it, pulling out my blade.

I roughly dug into my skin. Crimson red blood gushed out as I dug deeper. The blood rushed down my arm, staining the carpet. I closed my eyes, digging deeper.

My hand holding the blade fell weakly by my side. I opened my eyes slowly, looking down at my red arm. I watched the blood continue to gush out.

My head feels so…light. I closed my eyes as the room began to spin. I lost too much blood.

I opened my eyes. I don't want to die…not yet. I brought my bleeding wrist up to my chest. I collapsed onto the floor.

Don't give up.

I stretched my right arm out, clasping the rug to drag myself forward. I weakly dragged myself to the door. My body is getting heavier.

I sat up just enough to open the door.

"Namine," I called weakly.

I waited for a response. Stupid bitch can't hear me. I fell down on the floor, giving up.

"You promised," a voice whispered.

I promised. I can't break my promise. I sat up.

"Namine!" I screamed with every bit of strength I have left.

I collapsed. Everything is getting darker. I can hear…hurried foot steps.

"Roxas!" Namine gasped.

My eyes closed as I slipped away into the darkness.

I lay on a flat surface, watching the scene below me with interest.

The doctors rushed a stretcher into the room, trying to keep the helpless soul alive. They hurried around, saying urgent things to each other.

Namine rushed in behind them, tears streaming down her pale face. Blood stains are all over her white dress.

"Where is he?" a sweet voice demanded.

My wings bristled as I recognized Axel rush into the room. Sora and Riku hurried in behind him, looking around the doctors at the practically dead body.

"Is Roxas going to be okay?" Sora asked quietly, tears streaming down his tan face.

What is he talking about? I'm right here and I'm fine!

"He might not make it," Namine choked out.

The color drained from Axel's beautiful face. A sob ripped out of Sora's throat. He turned around and hid his face in Riku's chest. Riku wrapped his arms around Sora, resting his chin on Sora's head.

My wings bristled. I don't want them to hurt.

"Do you want to go back?" a soft voice asked.

I looked over my shoulder at a blond angel.

"Who are you?" I asked my voice unusually soft and sweet.

"I'm Ven," the angle whispered, his voice sweet like honey.

"What do you mean go back?" I demanded, making my voice harsh.

"Take a look down," Ven murmured.

I looked down, this time at the helpless soul. I noticed some blond hair in very familiar spikes.

"Is that me?" I whispered.

"You're about to die," Ven whispered.

I looked over my shoulder at him.

"You can choose to stay here or you can go back. There are benefits for both but I believe there are greater benefits if you go back," Ven murmured.

"Like what?" I asked quietly.

"Axel," Ven murmured, smiling as I smiled at hearing the name.

"Axel is your true love. You see, true love last more than one life time."

"What do you mean 'more than one life time'? Did I know him in another life?"

"You're wasting time. Go back or you'll never see him again."

I looked down at my body. My heart beats are farther apart now.

"How do I go back?"

"Close your eyes and think of a reason to go back," Ven murmured.

I closed my eyes. A picture of Axel filled my vision, a picture of Axel smiling. I love his smile, it's so sweet. He only smiles for me.

I opened my eyes weakly. I winced as the bright lights blinded me.

"Roxas, honey, you're awake," Namine murmured, running her fingers through my hair.

I took a shallow breath. I feel so weak.

"Where is Axel?" I asked quietly.

"Roxas, you can see your friends later, we need to talk. When did you start this?" Namine asked softly.

"Namine, can we talk about this later? I just want to see my friends," I murmured weakly.

Namine nodded, standing up. "Riku had to leave but Sora and Axel are still here," Namine said as she left.

A few moments later Sora and Axel walked in. Sora ran up to me, grabbing my hand. He stared at me, his eyes red and puffy.

"Roxas, I thought you were going to die. I told you to stop! You said you'd try! This isn't healthy!"

"Sora, Sora, please stop yelling," I said, wincing.

"Okay, at least you're okay. That's all that matters, right?"

I smiled a little. "That's all that matters."

"Sora, can I talk to Roxas?" Axel hissed.

Sora kissed my hand before walking over to the edge of my bed. Axel strode over to stand by me.

"Roxas how could you?" Axel demanded his voice harsh.

"Axel you don't under'—I began.

"No Roxas. You're life isn't that bad to where you have to cut yourself! Do you realize that you could have died? You almost took yourself away from me! How could you be so selfish? How terrible is your life to where you have to resort to this? Huh? Tell me how awful your life is!"

Axel stopped shouting so I can reply. I closed my eyes, keeping my lips sealed.

"How horrible is your life? Can you hear me? Tell me how horrible"—

"HE FUCKING RAPES ME!" I shouted.

Axel finally shut his big stupid mouth.

"Are you happy now? I get raped every fucking day! My sister's husband rapes me and tells me that he's the only person who can ever love me! He tells me I'm unlovable and he's the only one who can love me! Every therapy session I have what that fuck I get raped!"

Axel finally spoke. "Roxas I'm so sorry"—he began.

"No Axel! I'm tired of hearing how sorry everyone is for me!" I shouted.

Axel wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a hug.

I started pounding against his chest weakly, sobbing. "Get away from me! I hate you! I hate everyone! Leave me alone!" I sobbed as I continued to pound on his chest.

I let my arms go slack, giving up. I buried my face in his chest as I sobbed. Axel buried his face in my hair. We stayed like that for a moment.

I backed away, lying back down. "He's not going to get away with this," Axel growled.

"No! I can't say anything! I can't hurt Namine!"

Axel looked at me. "She's going to hurt sooner or later, Roxas. There's no way to avoid it."

I shook my head. "I can't hurt her again."

"I can't let this continue to happen."

"I'll be eighteen in less than a month. Then I can get away. I'll be free."

Axel shook his head. "He won't let you go Roxas. You have to see that."

He's right. Rufus will never let me go but he can't force me to stay.

"We can do something," I whispered.

"Can I kill him?" Axel asked, sounding very happy.

"No!" I said smiling.

"Aw, come on! I can make it look like an accident!" Axel pleaded.

"You are not killing him!"

"Can I hire someone to do it?" Axel begged.

I rolled my eyes. Killing Rufus sounds like a really good idea.

"Maybe," I said.

Sora looked up at me. "We're going to kill him?"


	10. Chapter 9

**Raise Chapter 9**

Rufus' POV

I skidded to a stop in front of my house. I jumped out of my car, slamming the door behind me. I stormed into the house, slamming the door behind me.

"Roxas, get your ass down here!" I bellowed at the foot of the stairs.

No response. Everything is so…quiet.

"Namine?" I called, walking up the stairs.

I walked over to Roxas' open door. My eyes scanned the floor. Crimson red stains on the carpet. Blood. I looked into Roxas' room. Blood stained the white carpet of Roxas' room. A trail of crimson blood started on the floor by Roxas' bed and ended in a pool at the door.

My phone rang shrilly through the quiet house. I looked at it before answering.

"Namine, what's going on? Why is there blood all over Roxas' room?"

Namine blurted out something. I couldn't understand because sobs broke out of her throat in between each word.

"Sweety, calm down. I can't understand you," I interrupted.

Namine took a few deep breaths. "Roxas cut himself too deep. He's in the hospital from blood loss," Namine murmured quietly.

"What? I'm on my way," I said, walking to the door.

"Did you know about this?" Namine asked.

"No, if I knew I would do something about it. I love Roxas, and I hate that he resorted to hurting himself to solve his problems," I partly lied. The first part is a lie but I really do love him and hate how he hurts himself.

"I'll see you when you get here," Namine murmured before hanging up.

I looked around the hospital. My eyes rested on Namine before I hurried over to her.

"Rufus, we need to talk," Namine said seriously.

I looked into her red rimmed blue eyes and nodded. She took my hand in hers, leading me into a hallway. Namine leaned against a wall, letting go of my hand and looking down.

"I don't think Roxas should take therapy any more," Namine said.

"What? He needs it now more than ever." I need it now more than ever.

"He can go back later but not now. He needs a break. I want him to relax and recover from this on his own before he goes back."

"Namine, you can't do this."

Namine smiled at me. "You really do care about him," she murmured.

"Yes, I do." You have no idea how much.

Namine leaned forward and hugged me. She kissed me lightly, I kissed her back automatically. Namine took my hand and led me down to Roxas' room.

Everyone in the room stopped talking abruptly as we entered the room. Roxas and the three other boys in the room glared at me. The one with the red hair glared at me murderously.

"Rufus, these are Roxas' friends. This is Sora"—she gestured to a spikey haired brunette—"this is Riku"—she gestured to a teen with silver hair—"and Axel," she said gesturing to the redhead with murder in his glare.

They all murmured their greetings stiftly. The tension in the room became uncomfortable. All their hate radiated toward me.

"What were you guys talking about?" Namine asked cheerfully, oblivious to the hate and tension thick in the air.

I walked down the stair, intruding on Roxas' sleep over. Everything got quite as usual when I enter the room. They glared at me as I walked in the kitchen and as I left.

"Namine, I think they are plotting against me," I said as I walked in our bedroom.

Namine laughed at me. "Why would they be plotting against you? It's not like you've ever done anything to any of them," Namine chuckled.

"But they always get quiet when I enter the room!"

"Maybe they are talking about relationships or they are planning a prank against you," Namine said. She doesn't believe the second reason. She only said it to amuse me. "They have no reason to plot against you, do they?"

"Of course not!" I said a little defensively.

"Then you have nothing to worry about," Namine said cutting off the light.

Roxas' POV

"Are you sure we can tell your dad's about this?" I asked.

"It's okay," Riku assured me.

I looked around Riku's all white living room as we waited for his adopted parents to talk to us. I looked over at Axel and Sora. Sora gave me a nervous smile and Axel gave me an excited one.

I looked up as two males entered the room. They both have silver hair. One of them has really tan skin and orange eyes. The other has really long silver hair and really pale skin.

"You wanted to talk to us Riku?" The cold voice came from the male with the longer hair.

"Dad, we need you to take care of someone," Riku said.

The male with the orange eyes smiled. "Our son is planning his first murder," he said proudly.

I raised my eyebrows. This is so not normal. Dads don't congratulate your son for killing people!

"Riku is planning a murder?" a monotone voice called.

A skinny male with midnight blue hair covering his right eye walked down the stairs, looking slightly surprised.

This is a weird family.

"Ooh, Riku's planning a murder?" a bubbly blond asked, bouncing down the stairs.

"Demyx, Zexion, go upstairs," the long haired male ordered.

Zexion and Demyx went back upstairs, following his orders.

"Who do you want us to take care of?" the orange eyed male asked.


	11. Chapter 10

**Raise Chapter 10**

Rufus' POV

I looked down at my drink. I reached out and tried to grab it. Shit, I missed. I blinked, trying to clear my blurred vision. My hand finally wrapped around the small shot glass.

"Bartender, I want more," I mumbled after I took the shot.

The blond boy turned to face me. His blue eyes rested on me, looking worried. I studied his weird hair. It's liked a mullet but a mow hawk at the same time.

"Hehe. Look at your hair! You're a freak!" I chuckled.

"Sir, I think you've had enough," the blond said sternly.

"You have blond hair. I like someone with blond hair but I haven't touched him in over a week! It's all Namine's fault. She lets his friends come over all the time and canceled therapy because he's doing so well," I mumbled.

"Sir, leave now," the blond ordered.

"Whatever," I said, throwing munny at the boy. "Use that to get a haircut."

I got off the barstool and walked out of the bar, into the night. I pulled out my car keys, starring at my car.

"I don't like my car," I mumbled.

I'm going to walk home instead. I don't wanna drive that stupid car Namine got me. As I walked forward a car engine started loudly. I turned my head to see a pair of glowing orange eyes in a dark car.

I ignored the weird eyes, continuing to walk forward. I walked down the sidewalk trying to stay focused. I felt something shoot out of my stomach and into my mouth. I covered my mouth, running into an ally. I leaned against a wall, by the dumpster and puked.

I wiped the disgusting stuff from my face, leaning against the wall. I looked up as I heard footsteps.

Two men walked forward. I squinted my eyes, trying to make out their faces. It's too dark. All I can see is a pair of glowing orange eyes along with a pair of blue glowing eyes.

Roxas' POV

I looked down at my seemingly clean hands. To anyone else they look clean but I can see the blood stains. Rufus' blood. My hands feel contaminated like his blood will be there forever.

I looked around at the scene before me. Axel and Riku carried Rufus' body to Rufus' car that Zexion crashed into a tree. We're standing in a small forest to the side of a small rode. Axel and Riku carefully set the body down in the driver seat, placing his hands on the steering wheel.

"Can I torch it?" Axel asked Xemnas.

Xemnas chuckled. "You can do the honors," he said, handing Axel a lighter and a bottle of vodka.

Sora grabbed my hand, leading me away. "Are you okay Rox?" he asked quietly.

"I…dunno," I whispered, watching Axel poor the alcohol all over Rufus.

Riku walked over to us, wrapping his arm around Sora's shoulders. Sora kissed Riku's hand. I think they are dating but they're trying to keep it a secret.

Axel closed the car door. He walked around front with Xemnas. They lifted the hood. Axel looked at Xemnas, Xemnas nodded. Axel set the engine on fire. Xemnas shut the hood, walking away.

"Can I set him on fire too?" Axel asked.

"I think Roxas should do that part," Sephiroth called.

Axel's eyes met mine. "Do you want to?"

I nodded before walking over. The walk seemed to take forever, like everything slowed down on my way to Axel. I finally reached him. Axel smiled at me as he handed me the lighter. I hesitantly opened the door.

I examined the lighter before pushing the button thing. My finger wouldn't go down. I tried to flex my muscles in my hand but they wouldn't. I looked up at Axel. Axel stood behind me. He wrapped one arm around my waist. He placed his hand over mine. His thumb pushed mine down, igniting the flame. I watched the orange fire dance before extending my arm. Axel kept a good hold of me as we lit Rufus on fire, burning away my problems together.

Axel wrapped his arms securely around me as he closed the door. He led me away from the car. I couldn't tear my away from the burning car.

"Demyx is going to call the cops soon," I overheard Zexion murmur to either Sephiroth or Xemnas.

"Then it's about time we leave," Sephiroth murmured.

"Let's go Roxas," Axel whispered.

I let Axel drag me away, still staring at the burning car.

I watched the sun set, red and pink clouds danced in the orange sky. I tightened my scarf securely around my neck as a cold wind rushed past me.

"Roxas…please don't," he whispered.

I didn't bother to look over at the stupid redhead. Why'd he follow me?

"Axel…please stop. I'm not coming back," I whispered.

"I said I was sorry," Axel whispered.

"I don't care. That's not enough. You're always sorry but you just do it again."

"Fuck it," Axel spat, causing me to look at him.

He glared at me furiously. He clenched his jaw, turning away from me.

"Can't you see that I love you? Do you even care? Everyone makes mistakes! I'm sorry I'm not perfect!"

I just stared at him blankly.

Axel shook his head. "You're pushing away the only person you've ever loved and you don't even care," Axel whispered.

How can I do this to him? I want to say I'm sorry but my mouth won't open. Axel, don't leave me. I'm sorry. Why won't my mouth open?

"I give up on you," Axel said before walking away.

I fell down onto my knees. I hugged myself as tears rolled down my cheeks. I shook with the sobs ripping out of my throat.

I woke with a start. Breathing heavily, I wiped the sweat off my forehead. Axel tightened his arms around my waist as he nuzzled into my side.

I looked at his beautiful sleeping face. I gently ran my fingers through his crimson spikes. His eyes fluttered open as my fingers brushed against his forehead.

"Hey Roxas," he murmured, pulling me down so that my head rest on his shoulder.

"Axel, can you promise me something?"

"What?"

"Don't ever give up on me."

"Why would I give up on you?" Axel asked sounding worried.

I closed my eyes. "Just promise me."

"I promise," Axel whispered.

"Good, because I don't think I can take it if you ever gave up on me again."


	12. Chapter 11

**Raise Chapter 11**

I took a deep breath before raising a pale hand to knock on the door. I looked down at my shoes to avoid looking into her eyes when she would open the door.

A faint, "Come in," told me it was safe to walk in my sister's bedroom.

She was sitting down in front of her vanity mirror, brushing her pale hair. She didn't look at me as I walked in. She kept her eyes fixed on her reflection as she brushed her perfectly strait hair. She started doing things compulsively a lot, ever since she found out Rufus died three days ago.

She would clean the table for half an hour when it would be perfectly spotless in five minutes. She would vacuum the same spot twenty times before she was satisfied. She would spend twenty minutes making her bad. She would spend an hour taking a shower.

I hated myself for causing her this pain. She cried all night and stayed in bed the next day, refusing to leave her room. I could hear her crying when I tried to offer her food or try to get her to come out.

I sat by her door for hours, trying to get her to come out and eat but she wouldn't reply. The only sound coming from her room was the sound of her sobs and occasionally the movement of things.

She didn't come out until I started crying, apologizing like it was all my fault...even though it is. She came out then, hugging me, and saying there was no way I could prevent fate.

"It's time," I said quietly.

She put her brush down, touching the sides of her pale face. She flattened her hair with her hands before standing up. She pressed her hands on her dress, trying to make it impossibly straighter.

"You look perfect, stop fussing," I said, smiling halfheartedly.

She pulled her lips into a little smile; it looked as if it hurt her to do so. After attempting to straighten her dress again, we left her room, heading for the backyard where Rufus' funeral will be held.

Naminé grabbed the urn containing what was left of Rufus ashes. There weren't that many people, having that Rufus doesn't have many friends or relatives and we're basically what's left of out family.

I took my seat in the front row as Naminé sat the urn down on the table before standing up at the podium. She took a deep breath, looking around at all the sad faces in the small crowd.

As she started her speech I looked around our small garden; you couldn't have picked a more beautiful day for a funeral…

"…his heart was so full of love; there aren't enough people in the world to give it to…"

I looked over at the small patch of flowers Naminé had planted around a small stone bench. She always loved to draw people sitting there…

"…he was a great inspiration to all of us. He cared for Roxas like a loving father when he had no one else to turn to…"

The sun glinted on our slightly overgrown grass. I always liked it that way…It hasn't been cut in weeks since Rufus had been so preoccupied and caught up in his own mind.

"H-He," Naminé stuttered before breaking down.

Everyone gasped as Naminé backed away from the podium, crying her heart out. I quickly ran over to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Naminé buried her face in my chest, sobbing uncontrollably.

"R-Roxas, I'm so s-sorry. I-I don't kn-know what c-came over m-me!" Naminé blubbered, wiping the tears off her cheeks, taking deep calming breaths.

"It's okay Nami. I'll finish the speech for you," I said before I could stop myself.

"Oh, Roxas! That would mean so much to me and Rufus!" Naminé said, flinging her arms around my neck.

"Come on Nami. Get up or you'll ruin your dress," I said, grabbing her hands as I stood up.

"Why, yes…Of course," Naminé said, getting up and brushing herself off.

She hurried over to her seat, smiling encouragingly at me. Wanting to beat myself for suggesting this, I walked over to the podium. I cleared my throat, looking around at the small gathering of Rufus' family and friends.

"Well, I wasn't expecting to speak today," I began, fighting the urge to run away, "so please forgive me for this ill prepared speech." I cleared my throat rather loudly, looking at Naminé.

Her porcelain face was shiny with tears; her pale blond hair framed her face perfectly. Looking at her made it easier to begin all these tremendous lies that were about to spill out of my mouth…made it bearable but didn't take the sharp pain away.

"Rufus was like an angel sent to us from heaven. Naminé and I didn't have anything and he took us in. He loved me more than I can say and…I wish I could talk to him one last time, let him back in our home so he can take care of again."

My throat felt tight, it was getting harder to breath as I went on. It felt as if someone stuck a big glob of paste in my throat, sealing it together, ceasing my ability to speak. I swallowed again, trying to get air back in my passageways. The cool air had little effect but gave me enough space to breath and speak.

"Every night, he would come in my room to tell me how much he loved me," I said quietly but loud enough so that everyone can hear me. At least that part wasn't a lie. Raping me was his way of loving me no matter how much I hated it. "I wish I could tell him how much that meant to me, how much it helped."

God damn it…I wish Axel was here…or Sora…or even Zexion. Just someone who understood where I was coming from! Everyone looked at me like I was the sweetest thing in the world and with sympathy…like my heart was broken by his death.

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath before continuing. I wanted to scream out to them that he raped me…that he wasn't the perfect therapist everyone thought he was. That he's the reason I hacked my wrist up…

"One thing that I will always remember about him is that day he visited me at the hospital…it was late and everyone had gone home. He came to tell me he wouldn't tolerate my problem…he was a little harsh when he told me I was being selfish but that's what I needed. I needed someone to help me and Rufus always helped me. He was our angel…our sweet little angel," I finished, my throat so tight that it felt as if my insides were going to twist up and kill me.

Everyone nodded in understand, some smiling, some crying. I tore my eyes away from the small gathering of people to the fence dividing our backyard from the neighbors. Someone with startling scarlet hair was leaning against the white fence, his arms folded across his muscular chest, dressed in a black suit, with that infamous smirk plastered on his perfect face.

* * *

I lay down on my back with my left arm stretched out and my right hand resting on my chest. I changed out of my suit when everyone left, now dressed in sweats and a T-shirt. Axel was lying beside me, examining my hacked up wrist carefully.

I turned my head away from the ceiling, looking at his face as he examined me. His vivid green eyes met mine. We stared at each other for a moment before he spoke.

"What are you going to do now?" he asked quietly, his breath fanning out around my face.

"I dunno…I got a full scholarship to Twilight Town University. I guess I'll just pack up my shit, get a job, and leave this crappy city."

Axel dropped his gaze back down to my wrist. His face looked impassive, closed, as he spoke. "So what? You're just gonna drop everything and leave?" he asked, his voice closed and distant.

"Not exactly…but I can't live in Hollows Bastion anymore. Too much has happened here…my parents died here, I was raped in this house…in this bed…We committed murder here. I can't stay here…I need to leave."

Axel sat up, his face closed and impassive. "Well, I have to go home." He grabbed his jacket and put it on quickly before walking away. I wasn't going to go after him…I refuse to.

"What do you expect from me?" I asked without meaning to. It was as if someone else took control of me…like I was in the back of my mind as someone else spoke from my body.

Axel turned around, glaring at me. "I expected more."

A scornful laugh escaped my mouth…a noise I never made before. "What? Did you expect me to run to you with open arms, crying like a baby? That's not how I work Axel, you should know that. I'm not as weak as I look…but I'm not that strong to where I can just run into a relationship after what I went through with Rufus."

Axel clicked his tongue impatiently. "I just expected after all that we went through together our relationship would be strong enough to survive anything…After what happened with Sora, the accident, and the fire," he said, his voice accusatory.

I glared at him…he still blames me for everything. "At least I can keep a promise," I spat, causing him to go rigid.

"What?" He asked, looking confused.

"Huh?" I asked, gaining control of my mouth again.

"Did you say something?" Axel asked, looking really confused.

"Didn't you?" I asked after a moment.

Axel shook his head. "Not that I can remember," he murmured.

"Oh…okay," I said, confused about what had just passed.

Axel turned to leave again…I sudden panic flowed through me, controlling me. For a second the scene changed, I was watching him leave into a stormy night. I shot up, wrapping my arm around his wrist and tugging.

Axel turned around quickly...too quickly. I wasn't expecting it. I ran into his chest and lost my balance. He quickly wrapped an arm around my waist, catching me before I could fall. My breath caught in my throat as I opened my eyes to see that Axel's lips were mere centimeters away. I looked up slowly at Axel through my eyelashes. The warm hand currently resting on my lower back was making it hard to think…hard to concentrate.

I cleared my throat and stepped away from him. "Thanks," I muttered, looking down at his feet. Axel took a step back, getting ready to leave. "Don't leave me…not again." Again, the words flowed from my mouth as if they were someone else's but no one else would be able to detect the difference.

Axel quickly wrapped his arms around me, pulling me against his chest. I automatically buried my face in his chest, inhaling his scent. I could feel the point of his chin resting on my head before I felt his sharp nose buried in my hair…inhaling my scent. It was as if this was routine for us…embracing like long lost lovers.

"I won't leave you again," Axel whispered into my hair.

"Promise?" I whispered, the childish question slipping out of my mouth before I could help myself.

"Promise," He whispered.

I felt moisture build up in my eyes. I quickly blinked away the pointless tears, pulling out the embrace. "You need clothes," I muttered.

"That I do," Axel smiled, taking my hand in his and leading me away.

I never understood it when Sora would tell me he felt butterflies in his stomach. I never understood how anyone could feel like butterflies were fluttering around in their stomach until this amazing person held my hand. My breath quickened as my heart beat sped up, hammering in my chest. I couldn't find words to describe what might be going on inside my stomach…the word butterflies instantly filled my head to describe the fluttering in my stomach…but no…butterfly wings weren't that strong. It was more like humming birds…hundreds of baby humming birds fluttering around in my stomach. At that moment, I had no idea where Axel was taking me but I didn't care…All I knew is that I wanted to be where he was…I just had to be with him and everything will be okay.

* * *

We stared into each others eyes, lying on our sides. I don't know how long we've been like this but it doesn't matter. It wasn't as if I was looking at him…but his soul. That's what I was searching for and I could see it…glowing beautifully behind his green orbs. I knew that he wasn't looking at me either…but at my soul.

I knew I was smiling like a fool but I couldn't stop even if I wanted to. I couldn't help but act like a fool around him…I was his beautiful little fool. A soft giggle escaped my lips at the thought.

My eyes widened as pink smoke left my mouth, ghosting around his face. The eyes that stared at me through the pink smoke were different; they weren't the bright green eyes of Axel…but the steely blue eyes of a monster…of Rufus.

Before I could even do so much as gasp, a hand cold as death grasped my wrist, burning the cuts there. Another cold hand rested on my warm cheek, cupping it in a loving manner. The smoke disappeared, revealing the sharp pale face of Rufus. A cold smile twisted his features, revealing his perfect teeth.

"Roxas, I was touched by your eulogy. Did I really mean that much to you?" He whispered, pulling me against his freezing chest. I shuddered, trying to break away from his grasp.

"Y-You're dead!" I said, pushing away from him.

"Oh, you silly Roxas…Did you really think you could get away from me that easily?" Rufus asked before laughing.

His cold laughter rang through the room, echoing loudly. It filled my ears, swarming around in my head. I finally pushed away from him, tumbling onto the floor. He was still laughing at me, staring at me from the bed.

I backed up into the corner, shielding my eyes and screaming for all I was worth. His laughter still rang loudly in my ears as I screamed for someone to help me.

Hands began grabbing at me, trying to pry my hands away from my face. I screamed louder, kicking at whoever was touching me. Whoever it was had really warm hands…it couldn't be Rufus.

"Roxas! Roxas! Calm down! It's me!" Someone was shouting.

"What's wrong with him?" Someone shouted.

"I dunno! I think he had a nightmare!"

"Roxas! Roxas sweety! It's me, Naminé! Every things okay! Calm down honey!"

The screaming stopped. I stopped screaming but I kept my eyes covered as his laughter rang still rang through the room…or was it all in my head? I seem to be the only one freaking out right now.

"Roxas, stop shaking." Calming hands rested on my shoulders.

It was only then that I realized I was shaking uncontrollably in a fetal position. I stopped shaking and sat up, slowly uncovering my eyes. I quickly wiped the tears off my cheeks with my fist like a small child, trying to control myself.

"What's the matter honey?" Naminé asked.

Her hair was wet and she was dressed in a bath robe. It looked as if she heard me screaming and hurried over to see what was wrong. Her blue eyes were wide and worried as they searched my face for any damage.

"Just a nightmare," I said, smiling reassuringly.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She whispered, running her fingers through my hair. I could feel her wedding ring as she ran her fingers through my hair.

"No," I said flatly, getting up.

Axel stood up too, wrapping an arm around me. "Must have been that movie I made him watch. I'm sorry Naminé," he lied easily.

Naminé nodded in understanding though she didn't look entirely convinced. "Don't watch scary movies so late Rox," she said before getting up and leaving.

"What did you really dream about?" Axel asked as I climbed back in bed.

"I don't want to talk about it," I muttered, pulling the sheets over my head.

Axel pulled the covers back as he lay down beside me. "You don't have to be so strong."

"Yes I do…or else I'd kill myself again," I muttered.

Axel nodded in understanding though I never killed myself…or else I wouldn't be here right now…right?


End file.
